Cairns and Crocus… and the Spirit of Place…

In my last blog I spoke of the spirit of place and the transference of energies that make such wonderful stories of mystical overlays. This piece I offer, is a short story from my collection in Scraps and Wild Gatherings, published in 2018. Prior to this, on returning to the UK for a trip down memory lane, rediscovering my earthly roots and birthplace, the stories in this volume took shape and grew into what has become an offering to my ancestry. Enjoy…

Cairns and Crocus

Spirit of Place

Chapter 1

An elusive breeze ruffles heart-shaped leaves. From outside the grove the Birch appear randomly sown. Closer in, it is evident, they create a ragged circle. Increasing in force, the breeze becomes a soughing wind. Autumn-toned leaves swirl away. A pale form walks the circle. Young and willowy, her saffron yellow dress matches the Crocus at her feet.

A sigh echoes. Busy Wren freeze in their seed and bug harvest. As the sound dissipates, one trills – its rustling feathers send a wave of warm-scented perfume, spilling from green-antlered Oakmoss.

Pia

Chapter 2

Sunlight filtering through the swaying canopy above, plays on my head, a warm balm on this chilly day. Chittering birds fly in, squabbling over a large moth, roused from daylight dreams. One perfect wing floats down, landing on my open sketchpad. A gold-powdered smudge. I focus on a small bloom, Saffron Crocus, Crocus sativus, a litany in Latin, rare in Victorian forests.

Energy surges from the earth, accompanying the words, “They keep me bound.” I have no idea what this means. I hear them, when the honey-pungent, Crocus scent engulfs me. Maybe I’m falling into psychosis? Hearing voices in the trees. Wispy visions of a girl reflects in pellucid dewdrops. It’s morning, but the dew has long since evaporated.

I laugh at the notion, although unnerved by my thoughts. I’ve visited this curious stand of trees often and find it odd that spring bulbs flower into autumn. There is nowhere else in the forest where a stand of Birch thrives amongst native trees. Perhaps there was a settlement here. I stand to pace, careful not to crush fragrant blooms while stretching my stiff back.

A twig snaps! The sound, like gunshot, ricochets around the grove. A Doe bounds into the glade. Exhibiting no fear, accustomed to my presence, she is another anomaly in the landscape and classified as feral to purists. All I see is a magnificent, sentient being as I back away to lean against an elder Birch. It quivers in response… merges with my essence.

My foot nudges a moss-covered rock, dislodging it. A rumbling noise has me clinging to the tree. A spill of rocks cascades across the ground, sandstone and glinting quartz. Earthquake? My nervous heart pumps, adrenalin surges. I’ve never stepped into the circle before, its message of intolerance at my curiosity, evident. Now, despite my panic, it beckons. I clamber over strewn rocks to stand in the heart of the grove. The Birch-canopy of amber and gold quivers. Trees shudder as I pass. Silence returns. I can see a shape that might be building foundations, reminding me of the stone Cairns in Britain.

I gasp. Falling to my knees, I stare in horror at the slender foot revealed, jutting from beneath the rubble. Skin, at first blue-tinged, then only a frail, skeletal foot remains. I shake my head, to clear my vision. A Cairn, impossibly Celtic, here in these Australian forests? A murmurous sigh fades from in the trees. Sobs escape me. Darkness sweeps down, smothering me in a cloak of silence.

When I wake, chilled to the bone, there is no trace of the Cairn or fragile remains, just a pile of mossy rocks on which the twisted Birch exert their unyielding hold. Scattered petals of rusty red, glisten… bright daubs of blood in the grass.

Michael

Chapter 3

Michael walked, careful of every step. He cursed silently as a twig snapped underfoot. Stalking a wild Doe, he watched her pause, bowing her head to something unseen. It took a second to align the telescopic lens, aim and fire. No gun, his weapon, but a digital camera. Whirring, electronic clicks, sent the Doe leaping. As she sprang, he got the shot he was after, her brown and white flecked hide, silhouetted against the broad trunks of silvery Birch-bark. Proud neck raised, eyes rolling, she fled. His second shot captured her grace.

He eagerly viewed the results on the camera display and, stepping back, oblivious to all else, tripped over a canvas bag, spilling its contents. Pages of detailed flower images blurred and shiftedunder his gaze. He felt suddenly woozy. The parchment sheets appeared faded, the bag, mouldy with age. Kneeling, he stuffed everything back unceremoniously.

With a cry of outrage, a slender woman launched herself at him. “What are you doing? You have no right to go through my things. How dare you! Look what you’ve done to the flowers!”

He dropped the bag, causing the contents to spill over crushed blooms. “Flowers? What flowers? No, please …I’m so sorry, I tripped and was just…” He blinked. The bag was no longer mould-covered but a clean, modern, leather satchel.

“…wanting to see what you could steal?” She finished his sentence.

“No!” Michael cried, outraged. “I’m no thief. You left your stuff lying around.” He stopped in his tracks. Close up she was exquisite. Before he could blink, rich perfume invaded his senses. Her features blurred. Bag and girl were gone when he came to, sprawled on the ground among whispering trees.

Raindrops pattered on the sparse foliage above. He smelled the lingering fragrance of flowers, crushed by his body. Flowers? Seeing a riot of colour, he gathered his wits and checked his camera for damage.

“Flowers! There were no flowers here before,” he muttered, “and the trees had leaves. It’s like autumn and spring in one place.”

His camera bleeped. Glancing down at the red-light flashing, he cursed the unusually short battery life, then paused, staring at an image he’d not consciously taken. It was the Doe, but superimposed behind her on the Birch-bark was a translucent figure.

He blinked. It vanished. Again, he felt dizzy. Three hours passed while he lay comatose and the trees wept their leaves.

Pia

Chapter 4

I return the next day; the trees are not welcoming but the flowers are blooming. There’s no trace of any crushed under trampling feet. Bemused, I sit to take it in, feeling anxious in the energy. “What’s the history here?” I wonder. A voice within replies, “You know. You just need to remember.”

Sighing, I settle to work on yesterday’s sketches of Saffron Crocus, adding rich orange- colour to spicy stamen, yellow to curve-edged petals, green to sheathed leaves. It’s quiet. No birds, no rustling leaves, a carpet of skeletal leaves has fallen overnight. “How odd,” I mused.

An icy draft raises hairs on the back of my neck; the Doe stands just inside the grove alone. Alarmed, she paws the ground, releasing pungent, leafy odours. Behind her, faintly outlined, is the woman. She is agitated, striding the circle, wide eyes staring.

What’s happening to me? Haunting images interrupt my sleep. Too real, all pervasive, they overflow into my waking state, beginning with dreams of the Birch grove, the vision of the spectral, saffron robed girl.

Why me? Self-indulgent tears well and the Doe springs away. I pace again, restlessly aware of my shadowy companion.

Michael

Chapter 5

Surprised to see the woman from yesterday at the grove again, Michael hid. He watched as she paced, crying. He wanted to reach out but witnessing her evident fragility, knew intervention could be counterproductive.

Last night he researched regional stories of Dreamtime legends describing volatile, Spirit activity. He found nothing of note relating to settlers, but intrigued, he read…

This location is a place of women’s healing. Underground streams create vortexes of energy, conducive to birth and death rituals, evident in ancient cultures.

He brought himself back to the moment. Ghosting behind the sobbing woman was another. Her double, dressed in saffron robes that swirled around her ankles. She sang, sad words ringing clearly in the crisp air…

“Where do we move between here and there

What do we become in transition and where

To a place within? Meanderings, sweet or sour

…and then in sleep, lost, many an hour… yet

summer wings enfold me and I fly

soaring, shadow-less, I soar

Winter wings enfold me and I die

…’til summer’s sweet renewal comes once more

Ancient sounds emerging make their mark

Winter keeps her own notes in the dark

Spring’s light brings soft and fragrant tunes

…while autumn sounds her notes like silver moons

All the while I watch and wait for you

to sing your song in saffron-coloured hue

Each season turns anew upon the wheel

When will you wake

…and in that sweet transition truly feel?”

Scents of saffron reached him. Looking down, he saw a tiny flower, knocked sideways by his careless feet. Saffron, a scented herb used in curry and cake alike. Saffron, the colour of the crying woman’s shirt and the robe of her translucent other. He knew he was witnessing a mystery, a magickal overlap in time. He had no means to comfort her. Not after the events of the previous day.

Pia

Chapter 6

I hear her song and promise I will discover what happened to leave her haunting the site. There seems to be an overlay to what I’m seeing, another scene drifting in and out of a different time and place. Leaning against my favourite tree, I listen, the words invoke grief… grief I’m not aware of personally experiencing. I listen, hearing the music to her song, feeling the rhythmic throb of a Bohdran vibrating deep in my belly and the accompanying, sobbing tone, of Uilleann pipes.

Suddenly other figures are weaving through the trees. It’s like looking through misted glass. What I thought were people dancing with her, are a group of huntsman, well dressed but not of this century. I hear hounds baying. The Doe bolts, but the girl stands proudly erect, waiting. There is nowhere to run or hide. Hounds, and shadowy huntsmen, burst into the glade. One, tall and gaunt, approaches her. Behind them, I see a building of sorts, its rough, circular shape, reminiscent of a crude, squat croft. She backs away. I see the fear in her eyes as he reaches her, pushing her roughly inside. His men jeer and hoot obscenities.

Then I’m there with the cruel-faced man. I feel her horror, her sense of inevitability permeates, and I feel faint from the fear of it.

“Witch,” he hisses, “you will die for your sins and no one will mourn you or send you to your Summerlands.” He spits the words at her.

When he is done with her, she is dry-eyed. Seeing her thus, her strength is enough to pull me back to myself. I scream at him, but he can neither see nor hear me. For a moment, she sees me. Our eyes meet across the centuries and thousands of miles. Briefly, we are one mind, one soul. “Free me,” she whispers.

Her murderer screams, “Burn Witch!” In my horror, in the unreality of it all, I giggle, thinking he could find something more original to say than words from an old movie, but it’s no movie. It’s real. Somewhere a young woman experienced this terrible death. Was it I? I will hear her screams always.

The hounds scent me, sniffing at my feet, unable to see my substance. One whimpers, licking at my hands. He can see me, sense me, as I lean against the ancient tree that trembles against my back.

I watch numbly as the man re-emerges, slamming and bolting the door behind him. Smoke belches from the roof, dry thatching ignites in a roaring shower of sparks. More crude comments, yelled by the watching men, chill my fear to a cold, seething rage. They may wear respectable clothing but they are worse than the lowest, ugliest life form to me. I am helpless to change a thing.

With a scream, I fight off arms that come from behind. Kicking and cursing, I turn, scratching at the man’s face. He holds me tight, whispering, “Be still. It’s okay. You had some sort of nightmare vision. Shhh now.”

He manages to calm me. I realise it’s the man from yesterday. I pull away, although I really want to hold on tight. I scream at him but it’s only in my head. I reel with shock. The vision fades and all that’s left is a Cairn of stones and a fragile, blue-veined foot. Then it’s gone too and the grove is still, but for the fleeting notes of her passing. A tendril of wood smoke carries fluttering parchment scraps, covered with intricate drawings of Saffron Crocus away into the forest.

“Michael,” the man says to me and I pull myself together, taking his proffered hand. It’s smooth and warm to my ice-cold one.

“Pia,” I reply. “Er …did you see …hear anything before?” My breath hitches. My lungs struggling to draw in air.

He reaches for me again in concern. “I heard music and saw a girl in a saffron dress, dancing. Then I heard screams, yours and hers.”

“Then I’m not going mad?” I giggle again, hearing hysteria in my high, tremulous notes.

“I think you had some sort of vision. Did you fall asleep or were you lucid? You were screaming at someone. You sobbed a name but I couldn’t understand it. It sounded, maybe Gaelic? Geni…?”

“Oh, I was lucid all right.” My voice breaks as I fall to my knees in the flowers.

Again, Michael holds me until my crying is spent and I manage to tell him what I witnessed. Instead of scoffing, he surprises me. “Well at least we have a story to follow up on. Although I’m sure it’s not from here, but somehow, a sending from another layer in time.”

“Another layer?” I repeat, hypnotised by his soothing voice.

“It’s okay. You can trust me. In fact, I think I have my credentials in my wallet.” He grins an open, friendly grin. “I’m a hypnotherapist. Well, that’s my day job. I’m a photographer too and I caught something on camera yesterday that made me come back to this place today. It’s haunted.”

His candid nature is refreshing. He takes out his camera, and searches for an image. It’s the girl in the saffron dress. Her face is mine. Everything shifts sideways. He calms me again and we sit to talk things through, his hand warming mine. I hear laughter from the grove and spin around. There she is, whole and happy, humming her haunting song. She dances the circle once before vanishing into the trees.

Michael drives me home, although it’s only a short walk. We agree to meet in a few days when he will hypnotise and regress me, back through the scenes I experienced.

I go back to the grove, but never experience the visions again. I often hear her song, until one day it simply ends. Her last note drifts away on a sigh. I see her in dreams.

Someone, somewhere, stumbled across a Cairn in a forest far away from here. Archaeologists discovered ancient human remains, which, later, they reburied under moss-covered stones.

A plaque reads…

R.I.P

We don’t know her story or name. She was a woman of approximately 20 years, who died, possibly after raiders came through. It was a time of witch-hunts, as Christianity made its way across the Isles. We can safely assume, by the well-preserved pots of herbal unguents and remains of dried Saffron that escaped a fire, she was an herbalist. Enough to be classified a Witch and executed.

We ask that you tread carefully here. Saffron Crocus grow in abundance. Scraps of cloth discovered, showed traces of Saffron dye from these same plants.

May she find peace.

Walking to the grove a few months later, I catch up with an elderly couple, going the same way. Their accents are broadly English as they greet me with a cheery hello, smiling as I pass.

The woman stops abruptly, blanching as she looks at me. Recovering, she says shakily, “Excuse me, do you happen to know where there’s a grove of Birch trees here?”

“Why yes, I’m heading there. It’s just a bit further.” They glance at me furtively, speaking with muted voices as we walk. When we reach the grove, they fall silent. I’m about to leave them to their reverie when the woman asks my name.

“Oh well, Pia… Pia Trethaway,” I tell her.

Exchanging glances and a nod, they tell me the grove is identical to one on their land. Archaeologists carbon-dated remains of a girl, discovered under a pile of stones. A Celt ancestor, they tell me excitedly. Reaching into her pocket the woman takes out an odd image. It’s a digital, facial reconstruction of the woman, found in the rubble. My face. I gasp, remembering my dream.

They tell me of Padarn Woods, Cornwall, from where the tree seeds and bulbs growing here, originated. Their Australian cousins brought seeds to Australia for planting around their homestead, to remind them of the Trethaway family in the Old Country.

Spirit of Place

I am earth, moist clay, trickling water, oozing sap. Suction exerted, my body, liquefied, moves up through twisting root. Under tender, silver bark, lichen and moss, I pass. All awareness gathers in one small seed. A cell of all my memories in one spark of life, before I sleep, dormant, enveloped.

Light awakens me; I recall snow, rain, heat and mist. Movement, the wheel of life spins on. I hear seasons change, a tinkling note. A leaf clinging tenuously lets go, as I must, all I once was.

Life is a strange omnium-gatherum of colour and odour, the light blinding in velvet-wet darkness. I push upwards, a shoot breaking free through Saffron clouds.

I have only fleeting memories of how I came here, being other than I once was.

I am the Genius Loci… Spirit of Place.

Where do we move between here and there?

What do we become in transition and where?

Space within, meanderings sweet or sour

…and then in sleep, lost, many an hour

…yet, summer wings enfold me and I fly

Soaring, shadow-less, I soar

Winter wings enfold me and I die

…’til summer’s sweet renewal comes once more

Ancient sounds emerging make their mark

Winter keeps her own notes in the dark

Spring’s light brings soft and fragrant tunes

…while autumn sounds her notes like silver moons

All the while I watch and wait for you

To sing your song in saffron-coloured hue

Each season turns anew upon the wheel

When will you wake

…and in that sweet transition truly feel?”

What do you think? Did the birch seeds carry memory of their ancestors all the way from Britain and was the imprint of the young victim of atrocities, strong enough to sow her cell memory by blood into the seeds, to heal ancestral pain?

Walk softly… you never know on who’s bones you tread… Awen /|\

Penny

Photography, art and words, copyright ©️ Penny Reilly all rights reserved.

Animism, Anima Mundi, Genius Loci and the World Soul…

Boo and Boody-bird are a fixture… they fight over food but otherwise spend their days hunting and calling to each other from the trees around the house… two misfits in a world of perfection-seeking beauty. Most of the flock that came through have moved on to harvest the bugs waking from winter slumbers but my two crazy opportunists have opted to stay, for now at least.

Boo keeps me company as I sit in the first sunshine with any real warmth, to dream of what I’ll be planting or have planted for spring. She seems content, a funny wee thing with her overly long and unnaturally twisted tail, while Boody-bird keeps a little distance unless I have a bug for each of them… then the squawking and squabbling begins.

I take a little time to think about the books and how to bring everything together… if I put it all down there’d be a thousand pages, so really, although the next novel has made progress, Wild Spirits Whisper is not quite manifesting yet.

I don’t want it to be a ramble of words… I want it to be just enough in art, photography, poetry and information to tempt a person to want a little more of my meanderings. Perhaps, how to make ink from plants, how to print with leaves or flowers, how to plan a sustainable lifestyle and garden without becoming exhausted in this crazy, in a hurry, world. Add favourite recipes to create from home grown produce; simple methods that don’t take as much out of a person to create. A self-sufficient lifestyle can be exhausting if allowed to run away with one… after all, it’s supposed to be a slower paced life, not one of worry and stress… and then behind it all is the philosophy of why…

Nature gives us seasons of plenty and of lack, but there’s always been enough to take us through a tricky season and naturally, we can’t grow grains or rice so we still have to invest back into a struggling system and there’s always tools etc., needed to run a productive farm and a productive farm brings people together and creates a community of like minds.

We keep items for standby… flour, salt, rice, a little sugar etc… and there’s eggs, root vegetables, berries or wild greens most of the year round. So my book IS about this natural lifestyle, but more simply, about re-finding, perhaps redefining and exploring the connection to our natural environment that so many have lost in believing we are separate from the rest of nature.

Anima Mundi is the lovely concept of a World Soul, a unifying principle that gives life and consciousness to the universe. Animism is the belief that spirits or souls inhabit all things, not just humans, and that these spirits can influence the world. This philosophical concept, found in various spiritual traditions, proposes a universal soul or life force that animates the cosmos, suggesting that Earth and her components are not merely physical entities, but are infused with a spiritual essence. So much of this is mirrored today in quantum physics and cosmology in terms of us and everything being made of the same stuff of the stars, planet and indeed, the cosmos from which everything originated.

This worldview of Animism, emphasises that spirit or soul inhabit, not just humans and animals, but also plants, rocks, and geographical features… i.e. Genius Loci. It sees the spiritual and physical worlds as intertwined, with all entities possessing agency and consciousness… in fact, all is one and so many have sadly been conned into believing we are not just separate but quasi, ‘better than’ anything else in the universe. This is our downfall as we watch the planetary system and wild nature that sustains us, become slowly untenable.

Modern Druidry, drawing from ancient Celtic practices, is inherently animistic. Druids see the natural world as a sacred entity, respecting its various elements and spirits. Druidic Practices often involve connecting with the spirits of nature, honouring seasonal changes, and recognising the sacredness of specific places and beings. This can include practices like tree planting, creating sacred groves, storytelling and poetry. Here in Australia, our own First Nation people, had such reverence for the land.

Still today, we Druids use the term “Awen” to describe the life force that animates all things and the creative flow that stems from it. This concept reflects the belief that all beings are interconnected and share a common spiritual essence.

Animism, Genius Loci (Spirit of Place) and the concept of Anima Mundi provide a framework for understanding the spiritual interconnectedness of all things, which is deeply embraced by Druidic practices. We embrace the annual cycle by marking the seasons and lunar months. Instead of blocking out the night which balances the day; our days begin at dusk and darkness is celebrated equally to light.

I could write about fears and anxiety for the state of the world but honestly, I think removing myself and speaking of things I love, speaking of quiet change that starts within a person is more profound.

Why does this all matter… I hear so many say, it’s too late, so let’s just continue the hedonistic journey to our own destruction…. but let me just say…

We need spiritually connected people with practical skills.

Healers who can empathise with people whether they’ve personally experienced a similar journey or not. Creative muses who know how to stack wood, plant trees, cook and scrub pots with equal enthusiasm.

We need teachers who show children the forest ways, how to tend a garden and share the bounty. To teach them to remember wild childlike being-ness over cyber rivalry and bullying.

Political and spiritual leaders who listen to bees, hear what the waters have to tell and the language of trees.

We don’t need the escapism of so called spiritually enlightened people who believe they are readying themselves for the ‘ascension of the special people,’ who would rather leave the world than face the challenges of reconnection to nature. We need a more authentic, down to earth embodiment of this existence… more grounded, rootedness. More thankful, appreciative ritual connections, that touch the Earth before wanting to escape to their concept of heaven.

If we walk together to the places where our souls can find rest, natural power is quiet, and sacred… not needing show off rituals that scream ‘Look at me.”

When the world unravels, we need weavers of energy and substance to reweave the threads… for what if this is all their is for us to experience in this, our current form on our planet?

We need community above escapism… we’re all in this together…

I will not apologise for being human

my place is here on earth

I will not apologise

for my rage or joy

…my dark and light

this place called home is falling into night

Constantly, I witness

those who believe they will ascend

…who focus on flight

on being other than earthly

…for me, their ignorance is a blight

We need those who walk the land

grow food and commit to life

We need those, who with tools in hand

…lend help to build a peaceful way

free from the state of strife

We are all one

A part of the infinite

We are all whole

only we have defined

even denied it

Dissatisfied with self

we seek to criticise another

forgetting we are all, simply

sister and brother

Walk softly… reconnect… Awen /|\

Penny

Photography, art and words copyright ©️ Penny Reilly, all rights reserved.

Are you dreaming…


When I ask the question, are you dreaming… is this nonsensical to you, or does it ring true as you wander through your day? Are you dreaming as you shop for dinner, get ready for work, herd the kids to school or onto school buses, perhaps battle the traffic into your work space?

Are you constantly elsewhere in your mind rather than where you actually, physically are?

This my friends is the illusion we constantly get caught up in. It’s the place of elsewhere and perhaps it’s where those missing odd socks disappear into because they’ve not been given attention. Well, they’re often thrown into corners or chucked separately into wash cycles without a glance or without checking that they’re both present, aren’t they?

So with this little reference as a key… how much are you dreaming of other places rather than being present where you are right now? How much of your precious time is disassociated with your actual life or your reason for being?

It’s not a trick question… as humans, the everyday becomes tedious when we’re stuck on the treadmill but often the escape from this isn’t necessarily a healthy alternative. Food and drink… elsewhere. Entertainment… elsewhere or watching/chasing internet imagery, to take us… elsewhere. Holidays or day trips… elsewhere. A change of scene and routine can be naturally therapeutic when we know why we’re trying to escape our everyday life but what exactly are we chasing and can we find it… elsewhere?

Wherever you are, stop. Look around and feel the space you’re in, particularly in your home. What does it feel like, look like? What inspires you? What is lovely, ugly, monotonous, complex, simple, uncomfortable or comfortable about this space. What would you change and why? What would you keep the same, and why? Basically, does it meet your physical, emotional, practical and even spiritual needs? But is it still liveable and can you s space, warts and all?

Is it a solid roof over your head… does it have clean water… do you have a little food in your pantry or can you wander out to get a takeaway of choice?

… do you have heating or cooling… do you have family and friends close by?

Now, do the same with your work space. Does it pay you a minimum wage… are there perks to actually having a job in the first place… if you’re a full time employee, is there long service leave, paid annual holidays, superannuation for later? If you’re, your own boss, what dream led you here? I’m sure you get my drift. We create our lives by making choices and we do, always have choices about which direction we may go… sometimes we choose wisely and sometimes things don’t turn out as we’d planned, but at least we made the choice through free will.

So now… imagine yourself to be in Gaza, Africa, Ukraine or anywhere in the world where there are wars, human rights breaches, floods, tornadoes, wildfires, volcanic activity, earthquakes… and simply be thankful for your perfectly imperfect life.

That’s all…

Walk softly… you take all that’s uncomfortable with you, when you want to be elsewhere… Awen /|\

Penny

Beyond the Gate Studio

Photography, art and words, copyright ©️ Penny Reilly, all rights reserved.

Scraps and Wild Gatherings…

The story that began the journey into my book, Scraps and Wild Gatherings, of the same name was published in 2017. It was a year or so in the writing and spoke through my love of my country of origin’s mythology and also of the diversity and mystery that abounds in the wildwoods.

Soon there will be a page here dedicated to short stories and book tempters for everyone to enjoy, who signs up for my website mailing list. I’ll also let everyone know of special prices and deals in all the sales channels… but I digress… here for you is Scraps and Wild Gatherings, copyright of course, to moi… a tale of the Wild God who is said to manifest in times of great need for both people and planet… enjoy… and may it bring you a different awareness to ponder on…

Scraps and Wild Gatherings…

1

A male form stepped silently from the autumn-toned woods. His clothes, of faded brown and mossy green, rustled like their crunchy counterparts underfoot. Taking time to brush himself down, he looked nonetheless, dishevelled for his efforts. Running his hands through thick chestnut hair that dreadlocked easily, his fingers snagged on tiny objects caught in the tangled strands, fragile offerings from his woodland kin.

He journeyed, simply journeyed, fast, manifesting in the lives of people whose tales he heard on the restless wind. Cerne was a traveller, but on occasion, he heard a cry that tugged at him so hard, he had to follow the call. There was no gainsaying it.

He could sense The Lady as she moved about her business in the wood. Her presence meant he was not alone in his endeavours. It was close to Lughnasadh and an almost full super-moon hung in the velvet night sky, a pale balloon. A pond shimmered in the glow. Mist drifted over it, making the pond a cauldron of light. His thoughts stirred it to movement. Tendrils crept across the ground, white fingers seeking. He felt The Lady again as she stirred his innermost places. Her hand caressed his cheek and pulled his hair. “Her Other. Her One,” her whispered words, the susurration of birds’ wings, brushing past him with her love. 

His boots squeaked on the frosted ground. Autumn leaves, pellucid, frozen, ice-droplets winked in the moonlight.

As he broke cover, a dog howled in greeting, not in fear, for he was their Lord. He whispered soothing words and the hound fell quiet. Other creatures stirred. He spoke in his mind to each in turn. Another followed him. Never far from his side at this time of year, his hound, Argentea, his fur, silver to match the fading moon, wobbling in her descent, on the edge of the world, before plunging, elegantly downward, to shine elsewhere on another landscape. Dawn lifted the mist, suckling at it, pulling it across the icy landscape. Below in the valley, wisps of smoke rose from the old farmhouse nestled there.

A young woman shifted in her bed …he felt her pain in inflamed joints and eased them, drawing a Sigel of healing with long brown hands. An older woman, one he knew well, stirred in her sleep. She coughed… he whispered a soothing rhyme to her, one she knew from childhood, whilst pulling thick ropes of mucus from her throat and chest. She smiled and, sighing in relief, slept on.

2

Grace Ludlow, walked the light-dappled woods. Late flowering wild violet and crocus added subtle fragrance to woody aromas of leaf-mulch and pine needles. Bright toadstools grew in circles under the canopy of ancient trees. Her sharp eyes noticed one of them had a single, tiny bite from its edge. Poor creature who’d nibbled… it would be a nasty death. She sighed at the thought, realising she sighed a lot lately. Brushing against a towering Oak released the heady scent of Oak Moss, which brought back in a rush the memory of her grandmother’s favourite, earthy perfume. She shut off the thought… a metal door slamming in her head.

Rain pattered on the crisp leaves underfoot. Those still clinging stubbornly in the canopy above, began to fall in shifting, coloured swirls as she walked toward home, creating for a second a shrouded form, before they floated to the ground.

     Reaching the gate between herb garden and orchard, she breathed the thin, cold air, easing and stretching her slender frame from left to right. Pain spread like fire through her back, down her legs. She was used to pain and it was a sure sign summer was over. Autumn’s chilly damp crept into her bones and joints during the night. She’d had rheumatic fever as a child, had overcome much to combat the pain arthritis delivered, the anxiety that accompanied it and sworn it would never get her down for more than a heartbeat. Grace knew it would change nothing to mourn a, so-called, normal life, for normal she was, the gardens surrounding her, testimony to that.

     She paused to lean on the gate, listening to the wind and the sudden lull in the chorus of birds. It felt chill and there was a sense of something impending …mysterious, unknowable. Although she giggled at her own fancy, she knew there was much that lay beyond the veil, unseen. Turning her head slowly, she made out the definite shape of a man standing on the edge of the Wood, watching her keenly, his features hidden with the light behind him. He appeared and vanished again in seconds, leaving Grace with a vague feeling of unease mixed with a leap of energy akin to sexual arousal. She felt her cheeks redden and heard a deep-bellied laugh from the Oak Grove.

     Perturbed but not afraid, she went indoors to light the lamps, close the curtains and stoke the fire. A longing to know overcame her, tinged with regret at his departure and the fear he might sneak up and peer into her windows. Although she shuddered, it was anticipatory. Goodness, what am I thinking? He could be one of the travellers, or a vagrant …he could …he might …she didn’t finish, blushing again at her own thoughts. 

3

Dusk plunged into night, taking no time to linger. Clouds scudded across the face of the rising harvest moon. Grace slipped outside again, to haul in enough firewood for the night and early morning, closing the shutters over the kitchen windows, against the cold. It was the room she lived in most, warm and cheery, her favourite, ratty old chair pulled close to the hearth where she could watch a movie on her laptop or play music until she dozed off.

Slouch, her fat mouser, huge and gnarly as old cats become, would join her, sidling up, before burrowing into the cushions beside her until he literally slouched in the seat, almost pushing her off. He’d been her grandmother’s cat originally but when Grace arrived on the scene, he deserted his long-time companion and followed Grace everywhere. Brought to the farm with the idea he would be an outside cat to keep the mice at bay, Slouch had other ideas, refusing to sleep in the barn, choosing the chair on the hearth, with great disdain.

His name originated from his low slung, slouching gait. Short legged, his belly almost brushed the ground as he slouched along. He was the cause of much amusement between Grace and her grandmother, Meredith, as they worked the garden together or strolled the land, wildcrafting from the bounty of the West-Midlands landscape. His passion was catnip, and the resulting euphoria he displayed, falling over or rolling on his back, tipsy, was a common and hilarious sight.

Grace discovered her passion for gardening, working side by side with Meredith, who taught her the ways of nature in more than the simple growing of pretty plants, including how to look carefully to see what a plant needed, when to trim or feed, when they were sick. There was a more magickal side to Meredith’s teachings too, little snippets of old lore that barely had names to describe them. Meredith simply called it The Old Ways, clamming up whenever Grace asked what she meant by this.

“Soon, you’ll be ready… soon enough,” she said enigmatically.

Soon after, Meredith’s health began to fail, slow to recover after a tenacious virus laid her low for months. Suddenly, an urgency dwelt behind her words as she shared the most intriguing plant lore training imaginable.

“Every plant has its own identity,” her grandmother said, “their Signature, each an individual as each person. Nothing is ever wasted, nothing left to chance.” Meredith encouraged Grace to witness the natural world in new ways, but then slipped away in her sleep just a few months later, leaving Grace her quaint old farmhouse, with its cherished gardens and orchard.

Orphaned as a child, Grace had been unaware there was any of her immediate blood-line left. One day, by chance, she walked through a farmer’s market in the pretty village of Padarn, set amongst rolling hills, when she heard someone shout her name.

“Grace, Gracie, is that you?” a melodious voice called. Turning around, she came face to face with an older version of herself and knew instinctively, this was her maternal grandmother. Meredith insisted, with an air of quiet mystery, Grace call her by her given name and would not be led to explain more than…

“Names have power, a resonation, a note in the melody of all things. They must be used with respect. Titles are just that, labels, which is why, in my day, we weren’t allowed to call our elders by their first name

Meredith, not keen to let her out of her sight any time soon, took Grace by the arm as if it were the most natural thing in the world, leading her to the little corner cafe on the green, declaring, “My treat.” They sat and talked away the years since Grace’s parents died, as if they’d never been.

There were no suspicious circumstances leading to their deaths, just a freak accident. Perhaps an animal ran in front of them causing them to swerve off the road into the tree, Meredith speculated. Under the instructions in their will, Grace was sent to live with close friends of her parents. Her only known relative, Aunt Kaye, her mother’s sister, was a traveller, with no intention of limiting her activities by taking on a child barely in her teens, omitting to mention, Grace’s grandmother was alive and lived in Padarn, simply because the family were estranged.

Margaret and Ian Glover took her in and were not unkind, just somewhat, emotionally removed. Being childless, business people, they had little knowledge of how to raise a growing girl, other than to give her the best education they could afford. It helped that Grace’s parents hadn’t left her penniless.

Her guardians were, however, alarmed at Grace’s reluctance to enter the world of academia. She had a leaning toward natural science and alternative thought. Mythology in literature fascinated her, and she battled against their suspicion of anything less than scientific data, unless it was anthropological, or at least, said with pained mien, historically factual. They feared even more for her sanity when she showed an interest in the oldest pagan traditions. Grace dared not argue that it was anthropology.

“We always knew your parents were” they said, sotto voiced, “…ahem, a little strange.” as though someone might overhear and arrest Grace for her interest. 

Smart at seventeen, and with no intention of upsetting the people her parents had chosen as guardians, she appeared to confine her interests to things they could never fault. Grace was a sweet-natured girl, showing little of the pain and turmoil going on behind her lovely face. She believed unfalteringly, someone else in her family was alive somewhere but just couldn’t be found, which further sparked her interest in alternative, ancient philosophies that gave credence to an afterlife and the importance of ancestry. Covertly, she studied meditation, the power of intuition and psychic phenomena, secretly wondering about the otherworldly things that so intrigued her.

When Meredith came into her life, she was just at an age to begin making important choices for her future. She dreamed, on occasion, of a voice, calling her by name, but when she looked around in her dreamscape, no one was there. One night, the recurring dream altered. At the edge of sight, the periphery of vision that forces one to turn quickly, yet fears to see, a figure stood hidden in the shadow of great trees. It brought her rapidly awake, her heart pumping.

On the day Meredith called out to her, she had been overwhelmed by a sense of Deja-vu. The voice, the scene, even the scent of the market square, the trolley of blooms the flower-seller wheeled by, were etched in her memory from that dream. 

Sadly, they had only seven, shared years, but there was a lifetime of love and learning packed into them. Now, at twenty-four, Grace had a life only dreamed of, despite at times her own physical limitations and, more recently, Meredith’s absence, which left a gaping void in her belly, almost akin to feelings of constant hunger. Burrowing deep into her studies, helped distract Grace from sadness. Nothing alleviated the pain of loss except her love of the land, which led to a journal of daily thoughts on the seasons, as nature’s wheel turned. This became a regular blog, spinning off to become poetic studies about country living, done simply. She took courses in horticulture and viticulture, in foods that heal and the ancient art of herbs for tinctures and tonic wines. Her skills with food became somewhat legendary after she added a professional cooking course to her résumé. From this, her idea grew to set up a small business using her own produce, manufacturing herbal wines, cooking homegrown foods in a restaurant that had a wine-tasting area adjoining.

     All she needed now was an original business name.

 4

Grace cycled from town one morning after visiting the post office, parcels balanced precariously in the basket at the front. She’d put up a notice for a strong pair of hands to help with the heavier work. As she peddled along the drive, a strange, yet familiar figure, stepped from the trees, bringing with him the warmth of a summer’s day in his eyes, despite the current chill of autumn. He was accompanied by a huge hound, who took an immediate liking to Grace. Worried the dog would knock her off balance, the stranger whispered to his four-pawed friend in an unfamiliar tongue. On Grace asking what language it was, he replied, “It’s a Fae tongue, Argentea understands,” he said with a wry grin, his words alluding to the intelligence in the giant hound’s eyes. Her curiosity quickened, but before Grace could ask what he meant, he continued, “I’ve come about the advertised work?”

“But I only just posted it on the community notice board a half hour ago. How do you know of it?”

“I keep my ear to the ground,” he replied. “I have strong hands.” He held out lean, long-fingered hands for her inspection, “and a strong back too,” quoting her ad, verbatim. “What do you need done? I need only board and lodging. The barn will do, for I’m used to sleeping beneath the stars.” His grin was mischievous. “So, what can I do for you?”

     Grace stuttered her reply. “We …ell, the vines need weeding around the base and feeding. Some may even be ready to harvest; it’s come early this year after all the rain. Do you know about plants then or are you more a handyman?”

     “I’m handy, Grace,” he grinned again, summing up her trim figure in a glance, “and I know much about plants. I’ll just stash my stuff in the barn,” he indicated the bag on his shoulder, which looked like a music case, “then take a look at those vines for you, will I?” and strolled away.

Grace could have sworn his clothing took on the colours of bright green leaves and his hair a tangle, like matted roots. A rush of warmth hit her cheeks, flushing them a tender pink. The blush didn’t stop there, flowing down her body in a liquid rush of longing. She recalled the similar energy she’d felt only nights before, then realised she’d not asked his name. “It’s Cerne,” he called from the barn, “Lleu Cerne.” 

“How did you…?” She called out, but unwilling to engage, she walked away to continue her work in the herb garden. Lleu …he must be Welsh or Cornish, she thought.

     Slouch appeared from beneath the barrow she’d left in readiness, winding his way between her legs and generally making it difficult for her to work. When she pushed him away, he simply jumped onto the wicking bed she was weeding and butted her face with his knobbly head. Climbing up her back when she rebuked him, caused Grace, to almost fall headlong into the mulch. Hands grasped her shoulders, pulling her back firmly. She struggled, but they were warm and strong and again, a surge of delicious energy coursed through her body and she found herself leaning back into his broad chest. He turned her around to face him. “Are you okay?” he asked, his eyes on hers, as blue as the flowering rosemary she tended.

“Yes, thank you.” A frown formed creases between her eyebrows. Reaching out, Lleu smoothed them away with a touch. Pain, which she normally felt keenly at any jolt or jar, eased away as if by magic. “Who are you?” 

     His smile was kind. He exuded the warm scent of moss and loam. “I’m a traveller. I go where I’m needed, for a while at least, before the Mother calls me.”

“I don’t understand. You talk in riddles. Your dog is like a silver-grey wolf and you smell wonderful.”

He roared with laughter at the horrified look on her face. “Oh no! Did I say that aloud?” 

“Aye you did, but there’s no harm done, for you smell like the rosemary you love, and the sweet scent of hay.”

     They studied each other a while longer. “Will you come to dinner this evening?” Grace asked, tentatively.

“Why, you’d invite me in?” His mischievous smile broadened but there was no sense of any ulterior motive behind them.

“Yes.” Grace said, simply.

“Then yes, Grace. I’ll be there at dusk.”

Autumn Spirit

 5

Grace spent time on her appearance that afternoon. Meanwhile a pot of soup simmered on the hob and cornbread baked in the oven. It had been a long while since she’d felt female and lovely, she mused as she dressed in her favourite amethyst-coloured skirt and white peasant blouse. She knew she wasn’t ugly by any means, but shy and a little stiff with strangers… the local men thought her a little prickly. Lleu brought out another side to her she’d not felt before. A languorous heat, spread through her body when he was near. It made her movements slower, graceful, as she groomed and readied herself as if he were already her lover.

Promptly, as dusk hazed the windswept autumn skies, Lleu arrived on her doorstep, a bunch of wild orchids in one hand, an unusual bottle in the other. Across his back was slung the bag he’d taken to the barn. Seeing her stare at it, he said, “My pipes, they go everywhere with me.”

She took the proffered flowers and leather bottle from him. It felt ice cold as if from a refrigerator. 

“I had it in the stream for a while and the water is cold and clear. I found the flowers on the bank as I was chatting with an Otter.”

She wrinkled her forehead at his words. “You say the strangest things,” as, laughing and shaking her head, she opened the door wide in silent invitation.

“You have to say the words, Gracie,” he said. His tone deepened, becoming serious.

Not sure what to think, she playfully took his hand, ignoring the rush of energy and heat that took hold of her. “Lleu Cerne, your name sounds like a Swiss Canton. Please, come in.”

Slouch, eyed Argentea balefully from the chair on the hearth. A peel of laughter came from the garden. Meredith’s laughter, Grace thought.

     He poured the amber liquid from the ancient leather bottle with great care. It glowed amber, in the sparkling, crystal glasses, Grace had set ready. Cerne looked at her as if assessing how much he should give her. Grace busied herself with the platter of fresh grapes from her vines, dried and fresh elderberries and cheese, as soft as butter, from her sheep. All would go well with the seed crackers she’d baked that morning.

It was as if he belonged, for now at least, in her kitchen. He walked the floor, stirred the soup, sniffing with unconstrained delight, at the earthy aroma of early squash, potato and herbs simmering in the leaf-green pot.

     “Please, sit. Eat,” she said, indicating the platter.

He nibbled a grape as if it were the first he’d tasted, whispering words over the food in blessing.

“You’re Pagan then?” Grace asked.

“Oh indeed,” he laughed, as if holding a mystery to himself. “I am that, but I don’t take well to putting labels on m’self.” His words rolled off his tongue in a soft burr.

     When Grace stood to bring the food, he put a hand on her arm. “Allow me to serve you. Are not the words to the rite of food serving, let the Priestess be seated while the Priest serves?” 

     She smiled up at him, an open sunny smile and a little more pain-etched grief eased away. She remembered the rites Meredith taught her and the words he spoke, remaining seated while he served the steaming soup and broke the corn bread with his lean brown hands.

     Before sitting, he raised her to her feet, handing a glass of the amber liquid to her. A tiny knife appeared in his hand from out his layered clothing. For a moment, Grace saw the blade glint. Lleu, ignoring her startled look, handed it to her, handle first. He knelt at her feet, holding up the glass that, for a moment, appeared as a clay chalice, wreathed with vine leaves. Words remembered, flowed. She plunged the tip of the knife into the liquid, stirring three times. “As the Athame is male,” she chanted, “and the cup is female,” he intoned, “conjoined they bring blessedness,” Grace sang, her voice clear and bright, “and oneness in truth,” finished Lleu, his eyes not leaving her face, as she took the first sip and then, hesitantly, kissed his proffered lips. If there had been music, it would have paled into insignificance at the sound she heard as their lips touched, of wind in cornfields and rustling leaves. If the sun were shining, it could not have brought the flush of heat to her body or the melting sensation in her belly.

     He steadied her with a hand on her shoulder as he took the glass from her nerveless fingers, taking a sip himself. “Well that’s done it,” he said, his eyes not leaving her face. They ate in silence. Grace thought the liquid he poured tasted of honey and salt combined, of the finest wine and the simplest sweet grape, of sunshine and ozone, on her tongue. Her own simple soup was pungent with herbs of earth and moss.

When they’d eaten, Lleu led her to her favourite chair by the hearth and, pulling up a stool at her feet, began to play. His Uilleann pipes, skirled in sweet, haunting tones, a music that brought tears to her eyes in joy and grief combined.

     Drifting with the music, Grace walked again with Meredith through the orchard, she’d lovingly tended. Talking to the trees as friends who understood, together they planted younger trees. They pruned ancient apple, pear, plum and cherry. They later grafted young, vigorous stock, from new trees to failing elders, feeding them liberally with manure from chickens and goats.

     It was the sound of the kettle whistling that brought Grace back to herself. Only one lamp remained lit, the kitchen was clean and tidy and the bottle of amber liquid in its leather bottle, sat on the kitchen table next to the orchids, in a chalice of autumn-coloured leaves that wound around the stem and into the cup. There was no sign of Lleu, and Grace knew he was gone. He left her a longing to know more and a warmth in her bones, where pain no longer dwelt.

     Wood baskets were filled, dishes done and the whole room, shone with a glow not of this world. Argentea, his silver-grey hound, lay on the hearth. He raised his huge head to regard her through eyes the colour of Lleu’s wine, before laying it on her feet. A throw, the colours of all the seasons combined, was across her lap, soft and delicate yet warm. She knew it held stories and she would find her way through their weavings as time passed. She looked closely at the colours of autumn, seeing corn and wheat in golden yellow and green. A figure ran free through the woven landscape.

     “Lughnasadh Night…” she whispered, “Lleu or Lugh,” She sighed. “It’s the night of sacrifice.”  

     With more strength in her limbs than she’d had in a long time, Grace climbed the stairs to bed. Argentea followed on her heels and settled himself comfortably on one side of her bed. “Are you staying with me then?” She swore the hound grinned, as Slouch moved from his chair and curled on the bed next to him.

     She undressed in candlelight, not wanting to spoil the glow in the house or the feeling it engendered. Argentea groaned as she slipped into bed next to him. He settled, his head in her lap. Dreams were rich and full-bodied, of wine and food, peat and oak-moss, indistinguishable from the taste of Lleu’s lips on hers. Sensations overwhelmed, lean hands moved over her, full, warm lips drank from her liquid places, leaving her trembling and spent. “Well that’s done it.” Lleu said in her mind before he filled her anew with his life force.

6

On the anniversary of Meredith’s death, Grace worked in the orchard, her fingers busy checking that old and new trees thrived. She felt Meredith close, hearing her voice clearly…

“Gracie, when I taught you about Magick, it was to instil in you the awareness to truly experience life. You have an innate love of all things natural, but if you’re not aware in the present moment, much is missed. When you work, or sit in nature, are you undistracted? Do you drink it in with all your senses or just one or two? Can you say you breathe leaves, taste their odour, colour, essence? Do you realise when you shed hair and skin, moisture droplets as you sneeze or laugh, so do the trees and every other creature that inhabits your world? Spiders and microscopic mites teem, leaving little particles of themselves everywhere. A tree sheds leaf, bark fragments, twig, branch and seedpod; drops of water and sap from their woody skins fall, just as the cells, known for a while as Meredith or Grace, fly off to become something else. As you breathe, you breathe their essence in minute particles. In turn, they, yours. How can you then say you are separate, that you have no knowledge of one another? The trick is to remember what it is to be tree, animal, bug or bird …in fact, all things. Part of you already does have memory of it. Its own Signature.

Gracie, the past is done; let me go. I’m still here in the wind, the trees …everywhere. Look to your future with joy. Find healing in the Magick that is you, for I …why, I’m still made of all those scraps and wild-gatherings.”

Grace whooped aloud at this. “That’s it, the business name! Scraps and Wild Gatherings.”

Laughter echoed. Trees shook in wild mirth. Leaves brushed her cheek… gentle fingers of memory.

7

Grace moved with ease through the dawn light. It was spring and wildflowers bloomed underfoot. She was careful not to trample them in passing, aware as she was of every scrap of being that fought for life each day, throughout the turning seasons. It was her birthday. Today, she was a quarter century old. A smile that never quite left her face, since her brief time with Lleu, deepened. She stepped onto the path that led to the village.

     That was how Luke Kernow first saw Grace Ludlow. Argentea, at her side, greeted him with a low, cautionary growl. He walked the lane toward the farm restaurant he’d heard needed strong hands to help in the garden and kitchens. Scraps and Wild Gatherings, he loved the sound of it. He stepped back so as to appear in her line of sight without startling her. She was slender and what should have been fragility, showed as strength in the tilt of head and long-legged stride. Nut-brown hair, left to blow free, brushed her shoulders in curling skeins. She carried a basket and was obviously heading toward the village. His heart did a curious, flip-flopping thing; a salmon wriggling on a line came to mind. Is that how fast a man can be caught then?

     For a second Grace hesitated, placing her hand on Argentea’s head as the man approached. Lleu? No, of course not, this man looked groomed and tidy in comparison. He was tall and lean, carried a backpack and a small grip in his hand. His stride was confident, even cocky, she thought …and yet. There was something about the eyes, a familiarity. They both stopped, taking each other’s measure.

     Luke broke the silence, holding out his hand. “Hi, Luke Kernow. I’m looking for Scraps and Wild Gatherings. I heard there’s work to be had there.” His voice held the hint of Australia that flattened vowels and rolled words together. He was brown from the sun, his handshake, firm. His eyes, she saw, were the green of oceans before storms.

     “Grace Ludlow,” Grace replied. “Well, looks like you’ve found what you’re looking for then!” He noticed, her eyes were almost violet in the growing light. 

     “Yes. Looks like I have.” His smile broad and cheeky, he bent to ruffle Argentea’s fur, letting him sniff at his hand. To his surprise and Grace’s, the hound rubbed against him.

     From the woods, they both heard a deep-bellied laugh and watched as a young Stag bound away.

Exchanging startled looks, Grace turned back toward home. “Come on then, Luke Kernow. You want work, do you? What do you have to offer? The vines are close to bud burst and I need help in the preserving room and kitchen.”

     “I’m handy, Grace,” he grinned, summing up her trim figure in a glance, “and, I know much about plants.” They reached the farm and he nodded to the barn. “I’ll just stash my stuff in there for now,” he indicated the bag on his shoulder, which for a moment looked like a music case, “then take a look at those vines for you, will I? He strolled away, humming in a rich baritone. “Oh, if you need a musician to entertain, I’m your man.”

     “Well, first things first,” she called to him. “There’s someone else come to meet you and he’s the toughest to please.”

     A large cat slouched along toward him, sniffed his boot, much as a dog would and, without a backward glance, jumped onto the stone wall to sit, washing his backside. “So that’s a yes then?” Luke’s laugh was rich and deep.

     “Well, that’s done it.” Grace whispered.

     “Blessed Imbolg, Gracie,” came the reply from everywhere.

Walk softly… dream a little… Awen /|\

Art and words copyright Penny Reilly, Beyond the Gate Studio, all rights reserved.

Wild Spirit… restoration or revolution…

In a world gone crazy, we are saner when nature is our guide. When all else is going to hell in a proverbial hand-basket, people, literally going mad with fear for the future, food security, medicines, ageing and educating children ethically, nature is a constant.

Yes, her seasons change, her patterns are in infinite flux and, when we learn that the ice caps are predicted to melt within 10 years if temperatures continue to climb, as is through recent summers, what will we do? Not to mention the threat of war that constantly hangs over us daily due to the madness of man in his quest to dominate and to control everything.

Learning the signs and signals nature provides is different for each of us, but there are hard and fast ones globally, that tell us of extreme weather events, daily.

Some we have relegated to the realms of myth, others are sniggered at, but the fact is, after studying these patterns for myself over a life time, I know they are no myth. When all falls quiet, not a leaf or grass blade flutters and birds are still, there are earthquake rumblings occurring. Birds and insects disappear before a storm and well before any predictions are broadcast.

When spring returns

there will be scents

of earth renewed

I’ll walk the soil

feet frozen

by the icy, morning dew

I’ll share the sun

as birds salute the day

from treetop high

in morning light

and when day ends

I’ll sleep the sleep of peace

as warmth returns

with every passing night

Days will lengthen

bird chorus my alarm

As sunlight streams

my senses are disarmed

for in the dawn

nightmares fade and die

I’m filled with the joy

of simple things

and with contentment sigh

When spring returns

I’ll raise my face to the sun

I’ll stand again in icy, morning dew

and like the earth’s new day begun

I’ll be renewed

My first foray into studying the behavioural signs of the wild was as a child, watching ants climb trees, walls and posts, secreting their eggs above, what appeared to us to be, an invisible water line. The higher they went the more rain was coming.  Snails and millipedes exhibit the same behaviour.

My first experiment to find out how long a snail lived, was with a dab of stolen, pink nail polish, on an unsuspecting snail’s, shell, to see how large an area it inhabited and assess if it lived more than a year. I looked at its habitat …a small area under a lilac tree, my favourite tree in my Nanna’s garden. I looked at how it hid away in winter, sealing its shell with a paper thin skin and withdrawing into hibernation. Did it worry whether it would wake again?

It lived many years, for after my grandmother died, I wandered her garden for the last time and there it was, and by then the snail was more than eleven years old.

Joey the Tortoise, was about 85 years and my grandmother’s constant, if aloof, companion, who she would feed fresh lettuce leaves to. I realised, she was similar to all these creatures. Slow moving because she took her time over things, relishing the ways of her garden and the cycles of nature. Living through two world wars, losing her husband to the WW1, a pandemic, plus other skirmishes around the world, she was a retiring woman of few words. Instead, she observed. She ate mostly from her garden, other than a little fish from the fishmonger, who delivered once a week, and cheese, milk and butter from the milkman.

A walk down the street with her, was usually to replace a button or have her shoes mended, again. She rarely bought anything new. She wasted nothing, and was a deep-thinking, intuitive woman, clairvoyant and a medium, who suffered often for what she saw, such as the truth in tea leaves, the way a leaf fell or a bird flew… and my own wild spirit is inherited from two such women, for both my grandmothers, lived these uncomplicated lives, translating nature’s rhythms into their own dance of life… and so am I formed.

I wasn’t taught these things in words, only through their awareness, if they taught at all. No, it was all by example and somehow, it inveigled its way into my psyche.

I always loved gardens, wherever I was in the world and in times of personal challenge and change, I would find solace in nature; a garden, a park, a wilderness and still do, to this day.

As a child in the UK, I was mostly classified as different to many children. I loved nothing better to than to be alone to run wild in the countryside, my sisters, both a fair bit older than me, were disinterested in the ways of nature.

Wild living isn’t about getting away from people, necessarily. It’s brought about by a need for the peace of nature to expand on a thought, a theory, or to bury pain in Earth’s dark depths, rather than to carry it around inside to create illness or to despair at the shape the inhabitants of this planet are in. It is however, all about living simply.

Wild Lady, Mother Earth, takes everyone’s pain, wordlessly, without judgement and completely, if we stop picking at old scabs and scars, to check if they still hurt. Maybe they still do. Yet, it’s not the moment where the original pain occurred or exists because it’s now, not then and this moment in consciousness, in the eternal now of moments.

We can choose to continue, hell bent on our linear journey, or we can embrace a broader field of awareness. How we respond now is the ‘make or break’ to heal it. How we own our part in it, rather than blaming another, or circumstances beyond our control, which lends itself to victimhood, when it can be a learning curve for new understanding.

Sometimes, we use our drama to enhance our pain because it is through this, we feel greater… our ego feeds on it to make us think that’s all there is and that it’s the norm of the world. Well of course it’s not. Social media is the classic example of pain sharing and is at epidemic proportions particularly as I began writing this little piece for my next book through the Coved-19 pandemic. Supporting pain, for pain’s sake, is not a solution to healing the root cause… but I digress.

Restoration, a revolution for change in how we see our world, is the ultimate healing paradigm. A conscious, peaceful revolution… to restore Wild Mother to wholeness, is to restore ourselves. That said, Wild Mother will continue on her journey, with or without us… it’s our choice but important, is that we don’t become overwhelmed by the enormity of it all. We each need to focus on our own back yards, so to speak.

Wake up humankind. Stand up and be counted. Nature is the healer. If we learn her magickal, natural and resourceful ways and how to translate her messages, not generically, but for ourselves, everything may be healed, layer by layer, season by organic season.

Walk softly… step up… Awen /|\

Penny

Photography, art and words copyright ©️ Penny Reilly all rights reserved.

On the move towards Solstice…

Winter arrived with a boom… days of autumn sunshine and colour, turned white by instant frost… brrrr, -3°.

Still… winter brings introspection as solstice approaches. We burrow deep into the cold… dark days, somehow bring hope. We know, subtle underground movement is already afoot… green shoots silently unfurl to break through the icy crust. When I close my eyes, I imagine them slumbering, waiting and with animism, perhaps anticipating, how the light will feel on their green flesh… sunlight, pulling on them, tugging them to reach up to the light from the darkness beneath.

Sow the seeds
Weave the web in time
Weave
sow
Grow
in wisdom
in knowledge
of the
life stream
and the
soul spark
of
intelligence
…breathe
All one
Awen

I love to connect in this way to the earth and all things, by knowing I am a part of it all, as it is all a part of me… all of me, contributing to the wheel of life.

Life is a moment and in that moment, all moments exist. Life can appear fleeting or be forever in full consciousness. There is no separation between who we once were in the scheme of things, are now or will be “one day”, for all is a continuum.

Complex thoughts, and yet not, unless one thinks in straight lines, past, present, future rather than in circles, and cycles of ascension and descension… expansion and contraction, filling up and emptying out.

There again, perhaps our very challenge is overthinking. Does nature think, “I’m a daisy; I wanted to be a rose.” Does an amber-coloured leaf in autumn, wish to be green?

As children, we fight to maintain our identity until parental expectation, educational institutions and peer pressure, forces competition, whittling away at our personality, character and psyche until we’re swamped, drowning, in other’s expectations of how they perceive we should be. We’re moulded by circumstance.

This is the pivotal moment, when we can realise, we are in fact, our inner parent or teacher, continuing to hear and be instructed by the echo of their physical counterparts instead of learning to simply be ourselves.

The thing is… nature doesn’t judge how we behave, how we express ourselves or criticise who we intrinsically are, with or without societies trappings… just as a daisy doesn’t wish to be a rose.

Letting go of guilt-induced reactions to how others respond to our internal change, can be like running a marathon… but when does the adult self, stop apologising for who they are, despite the constant inner and outer critique.

Nature doesn’t judge the leaves falling, to strip branches bare, or new leaves budding on near-naked limbs.

Life in all its ages and stages is a precious gift so why waste it, desiring to be something we were not designed to be? Isn’t this a unique wonder in itself?

Observing nature, we see there are few straight lines, except those we create. Nothing is linear. Droplets of water constantly change shape to adapt and are a part of a greater body be it a droplet, an ocean or small pond. If we understand everything is energy in constant motion, where there is a void space, something always rushes to fill it and there is no judgment in the process. Unless we ourselves, judge that filling as good or bad and this, dependent on where our thoughts are leading us.

If we can reconnect to nature’s cycles, movements, brief pauses, breath held and let go… a beating heart, a pulse within myriad pulses, we simply become. Every cell becomes luminous with cell-wisdom-memory of everything experienced, and in the remembering, remembers its source.

When we become aware, strength lies in the allowance of emptiness and in not filling empty spaces. In this knowing, we can choose substance to fill the void, and in fact always do, even by not choosing. Waiting, empty, gives us clarity to know what we truly desire. I speak not of “having” for the sake of it …because it’s the most recent fad or gadget, but more the awareness, “being in emptiness” can bring. It has its own taste, smell, sound, sensation and there is nothing to fear there, except the proverbial fear itself.

My waking and sleeping moments, fill with the rhythm and scent of nature’s cycles rather than the tick-tock of the business world. Although that said, I run my own studio… one has to live, but the key is to find the ultimate balance between the perceived mundane and the “spiritual life” …and there we have it – everything is spirit/energy, and therefore, spiritual… sacred.

Hollowing out
emptying
Seeking the purpose of life, 
in simply being
Giving up
the fight for more, 
allows unhindered flow

Living… simply being
with no place
left to go
Past
present
future
merges
the well of life 
upsurges

The wheel spins
on and round
All places, 
all seasons
begin and end
…on sacred ground.

The ocean tides, whittle away at the shoreline as we wear away our lives, often in needless struggles for understanding.

All energy is in motion constantly, in waves and pulses, just as our body is in flow and flux, cyclical birth to death, with each waxing and waning moon. We are ultimately 78% fluid. Our body is at the mercy of those internal and exterior tides unless we can be observant, present in awareness as those tides turn. Thus, we can see ourselves not as helpless puppets, but empowered by those very tides, toward the shores of creative consciousness by our own choices.

Our natural state
of being
is magick
Moving between
full, exhilarant joy
and oft, comedy tragic
Spaces between
filled with
liquid notes sublime
in cycles spinning
adhering to the rhyme
Diaphonous, silken threads
on the loom of time
fading in and out
annual, biannual, diurnal
We are but a blip
in life eternal

If we can reconnect to nature’s cycles, movements, brief pauses, breath held and let go… a beating heart, a pulse within myriad pulses, we simply become. Every cell becomes luminous with cell-wisdom-memory of everything experienced, and in the remembering, remembers its source…

Walk softly… make wise choices… Awen /|\

Penny

You can now find me at my website http://pennyreillyauthor.com for direct book purchases.

All photography, art and words copyright ©️ Penny Reilly, all rights reserved.

Writing for the muse of seasons… A Wild Spirit…

Autumn for me is the season of the muse… she arrives in the rustle of dry leaves underfoot and the soft earthy scents of moss and mud.

I decided to begin the first chapter of A Wild Spirit (now that the the layout and ideas are more firmly strung together (rather than rattling around like wooden beads on a thread), with the season of autumn as she wanders through my psyche, trailing long sleeves of frost and dew, through the icy portal towards winter.

She’s such a delicate entity, made of pure reason and yet prone to throw off the season’s delicately coloured skeins and stride along in white and silver, moon-struck lace, just to catch one unawares… sprinting ahead with random ideas, thoughts and dreams of a final completion to another year and the beginning of another book… my tenth.

Yet, in this season of withdrawal, when leaves fall, let loose by the retreat of sap and energy, we too may go within and seek out the next phase of our being. Just as I attempt to do same… there she is, entering my dreams with odd sounds and symbols. Clattering around like a cook in a kitchen who can’t find the right implements to create a feast, all in my sleeping psyche.

At first she leaves only remnants for story, prose, art or poetry but then in she comes with the rubber mallet, leaving larger deposits of data for my battered brain to work through and it’s precisely at this moment it’s time to retreat to the studio… no matter the given hour, to write or paint until she leaves me to my slumbers…

As this inner dialogue progresses, amounts of information are downloaded in huge juicy bites (sometimes, sound-bites) then it’s left to me to conjure it into some sort of order, understandable for mortal ingestion.

When spirit speaks
in muffled tones
and autumn drifts
into wintry zones
you can feel the calling
in your very bones
…speaking the rhythm of nature

When mind clouds gather
and winter winds roar
the muse enters
through a forgotten door
taking your mind to leap and soar
…singing the rhythm of nature

When the mind is free
to wandering
allowing the time
for pondering
a landscape appears
beyond all mortal fears
…whispering the rhythm of nature

…and so the journey of creation begins as I dive into wintry solitude with my whispering muse.

Walk softly… listen to the season’s muse… Awen /|\

All photography, art and words copyright Penny Reilly, all rights reserved

What dreams are made of…

Bee Vibrations

We dream… we all dream, sadly mostly of ‘one day when,’ with little appreciation of today, this moment and the fact that we’re here, alive, sentient and uniquely individual and that we can make a difference wherever we are on this beautiful earth home by needing/wanting less…

Naturally, there are those things we need for basic comfort and safety… a roof over our head, clean water and fresh food, loving relationships, community and family friendships… this goes without saying but objects do not bring lasting happiness.

Just for a moment, in that ‘wherever’ space you reside in this moment, stand still. Close your eyes and simply focus on your breath… then consciously shift to a four count breath in and eight count breath out, which allows the lungs to clear the stale air from the bottom of the lungs fully. You may feel a little dizzy if you’re not used to truly emptying out your lung capacity but then there should come a sense of euphoria at being in ‘clean, full breath’ mode…

When we find this space on a more constant level, we begin to relax into our day more easily and no matter where we travel through the day, we remain more and more in this space of awareness until we no longer have to think about the getting there, we just are there.

The hum of bees can bring you that same feeling… the purr of a cat, wind in the trees, the tap, tap, rhythmic tap of a branch against your window, the mournful cry of curlew… even a gentle snore of a close partner can soothe and relax the diaphragm and release breath deep from within… stress held in our very bones…

Water colour and ink 🐝 @ Penny Reilly

Today’s stresses puts a burden on us… changing our way of being constantly in angst and easing the way to a more conscious approach leads to simply being… in our work, in relationships, family crisis… all emotions are better handled… more kindly and intuitively handled, when we come from a place of inner peace, leading us on into inner strength.

With our mind clear, we better know what action to take rather than acting on impulse in sticky situations from a base of fear.

🐝 vibrations

Simple thoughts and actions and yet, simplicity is the key to everything, whittling down complexity into bite size pieces. Tackling the frustrating need for things, perceived to be out of reach… realising objects are mostly on a want not need basis, especially if they don’t come under the simpler needs of life, which in turn releases the fear lack.

This is the space within, from which I write and/or paint. Connected to nature allows a quasi download of information to flow. I recognise it by the ease of it and by not needing to stress about the process or worry that if I don’t get it down quickly, it will disappear. Thoughts disappear but this space remains. It’s a combination of seeing and listening that goes beyond stressing about a particular context. Editing comes much later, after the whole piece is written.

To be in this space most of the time here at home on the farm amongst the wildlings, is where it all begins and ends. It can be naturally triggered by a sight, a scent, a sound or a fleeting feeling of something ‘other’ occurring. An image can trigger words and words can trigger an image to form in my artwork… nothing happens in isolation and thus, we find a wholeness in all of our senses combined and individually. When we apply this to our ability to dream, we create whole new possibilities for understanding our existence, which includes acceptance of the fact that we are creating our own life and purpose… hopefully giving us the reason for being rather than constantly asking the universe to tell us what to do or to make our ‘purpose’ known to us.

in this space we get to decide and create that purpose…

Deep within
the wild dreamer stirs
awakening from slumber
as change occurs
Be willing to sense
how your own needs are met
Stay awake… be aware
lest your dreams you forget
You are the dreamer
and you are the dream
One and the same
it’s within to be seen
You have slept long enough
wake up human-kin
Awaken the wild dreamer
find your truth
find your magic
…within


Walk softly… edit the dream when it no longer describes your purpose… Awen /|\

Penny

Photography, art and words ©️ copyright Penny Reilly, all rights reserved

Summer peak and autumn rush… and the word, entitlement…


Late summer rains arrived… timely after a dry spell and we had temperatures nothing nearly as aggressive as the bush fires in the Grampians and other regions… it would seem that every year, just as it gets warm and dry, our hills drop in temperature and the autumn mists arrive, cooling the ground to create our green oasis and tiny birds… fairy wrens and honey eaters arrive to sip at water droplets and nectar alike.

Hawthorn berries are ripened early in the arctic cold snap and the produce coming in at the moment keeps me on my toes.

Where the rest of this article went, I really don’t know but stay tuned and the next post will follow through.

Walk softly… Be gentle… Awen /|\

Penny

Nature’s fast lane… around the farm and in my studio…

Nature is in a hurry this summer… we don’t usually harvest quite so many tomatoes this early in January and the continuum is normally into May/June for the season to end. Many are still coming on and the harvest is now a daily practice again… soon I’ll start passata making, kasundi relish, dehydrate to make an intense powder to rehydrate for pizza and/or pasta sauces or oven slow roasted to preserve in oil or freeze.

In the same theme, elder, rowan and hawthorn berries are well on the way, which to me, indicates a short intense summer and an early autumn, manifesting.

Our cherry season is the best in many years and it’s always a race to pick and process them before the bloom, so to speak, is off the cherry… happily mixing metaphors here 😏

Community Kitchen

Self sufficiency is about preserving, (and as mentioned many times, not about hoarding), as much as possible in the way of healthy produce and understanding there are multiple uses and ways to preserve the goodies. Freezing, dehydrating, pickling, conserves, bottling in syrups or alcohol to name but a few. Every year I discover new methods despite many years of growing, harvesting and preserving food that sees us through winter, allowing us to share, both fresh and preserved foods.

I often freeze produce first to preserve them when I can’t process fast enough before they decay. Cherries, for instance, can be frozen with their stones left in. This also makes pitting easier on defrosting as they tend to be a little softer than fresh from the tree, which is ideal for jam making or for tart fillings, syrups, juices etc… let’s face it a harvest of 75 kg is huge and not something two people can eat alone but sharing both harvesting and the loot is a wonderful and fun community endeavour.

Preserving in alcohol is a simple way to create both boozy-soaked cherries and a syrup, versatile in their uses, such as pouring over icecream, (adults only) adding to tart fillings or simply as a syrup in a glass of bubbles or a cocktail. Brandy, vodka, gin, port, wine etc., all make a wonderful preservative together with a little sugar, lemon juice, orange peel, spices such as star anise, cinnamon, vanilla bean etc., and the purchased spirits don’t have to be the most expensive brands, either.

To start from scratch with producing a delicious cherry mead for the cold season to come is a delightful experiment, using honey, lemon, yeast and sugar for the natural ferment process and of course, cherries.

The bottles shown above will be turned upside down every couple of days to make sure the sugars are distributed through the liquid… alcohol dissolves the sugar fast but sugar can also sit on the bottom for longer than practical and if not shaken up a little, slows down the ferment process.

Orchard Harvest

Next will come apples, pears and autumn raspberries and blueberries… beans are making another round of flowers and I’ll be planting another sort for a longer season. Cucumber, melon and pumpkin are all flowering and if their flower promise makes good, then another major spell in the kitchen will arrive.

Beetroot are just about ready to harvest and as they come on all at the same time, I’ll wash and freeze for later pickled beet or slice thinly and dry for a vegetable powder or chips to nibble.

Next comes onions and I might experiment with making a powder for winter use and so that too many don’t bolt to seed quickly. I noticed packs of dried vegetable powder at the local supermarket, advertising a way to get an intense amount of vegetable into the diet but too much is also not a good thing to overload the system with and at $11.00 for 250g, that’s outrageous. Powders are great to preserve a glut and to use when a particular vegetable is either too expensive or unavailable due to crop harvest issues but can never replace freshly grown produce.

Then will come the battle to net grapes and hazelnuts so that we actually get to eat some. We may well leave some for the birds but trust me, they don’t leave a scrap for us if left unchecked.

Everything is in abundance as storm clouds gathered again this afternoon… so I disappeared into my studio to sit it out and make some inroads into finishing a few pieces I’ve been working on and also little by little setting up and Etsy shop for people to buy my prints and cards online. A safer platform for both myself and my clients, thus far, so, as they say, ‘watch this space!’

You can view from the various galleries right here on my blogsite, prints, cards and books to give you an idea of what’s on offer…

Meanwhile, it’s back to the kitchen to check on tomatoes in the dehydrator and then time in the studio setting up the store…

Walk softly… juggling life… Awen /|\

All photography, art and words copyright Penny Reilly, all rights reserved.